Of Men, Knighthood, and Fighting to Protect #Catholic

The reason that we became warriors in the first place was to protect the people we love.

- My husband

I was touched by a New York Times story I found through "Auntie Seraphic's" wonderful blog, Seraphic Singles. Her Sunday entry, Love in the New York Times, was a sad tale of a young woman's quest to find real men to date -- and not "guys." Her definition of "guys" were young men who wanted nothing to do with committing themselves to a relationship, instead preferring a cloudy haze of hanging out and occasional casual sex.

I was both saddened and angered by the article. Saddened that so many young women now have this to deal with, and angered by the seemingly never-ending consequences of radical feminism in our country.

I had a very long discussion with my husband regarding the topic. Basically, I wanted to know how he developed his respect for women. Did it begin when he was younger? What influenced him?

His answers were a mixture of his upbringing, his involvement with Japanese martial arts, and his desire to follow the Biblical pattern for a marriage. My husband had a father who modeled to his sons how to treat women. One time, my husband's older brother back-talked his mother and received a quick slap from his father as he said, "I don't ever want to hear you disrespect your mother like that again." The point was made. You respected your parents and especially didn't mouth off to your mother.

My husband was raised in an era when men usually helped women with heavy burdens like grocery bags and luggage. When he was 20 years old, he became involved with martial arts and was especially intrigued by the Samurai warriors. The Samurai have a code called bushido, translated as "the way of the warrior." Part of the code is treating others with respect and honor. This extended to how the warriors treated women, especially their wives.

I asked my husband if knighthood was similar to the bushido. He said yes. I found it interesting that long ago, throughout the world, there could be found a certain elite class of men who fought for justice, defended the defenseless, and showed respect and honor to women.

When he said the quote I posted above, suddenly I had a revelation of how much we have lost when we started to raise boys who were forbidden to fight.

Feminism destroyed this natural inclination in men by claiming it was wrong to fight, under the guise that "two wrongs don't make a right." Suddenly, fighting either in a battle or simply fighting to defend a woman's honor was attacked. The concept of a righteous battle faded as more and more young boys were scolded for fighting and older young men were belittled for wanting to join the military.

In essence -- the natural desire of men to want to find something worth defending; and then doing it, has been ripped away. In its place, we now have a generation of young men who not only don't know how to fight, but wouldn't know what to fight for if given the opportunity. Aside from our brave men and women in the military, fire departments, and police -- most younger men avoid confrontation of an enemy like the plague.

I grew up with the wise words, "It's always better to use your head than use your hands." However, my father and the men of my family realized that there were times when defending those you loved meant taking a stand. I won't ever forget the time when some teenagers decided to vandalize our home because my father placed a fence on our property, which covered an entrance to a wooded area. One night a big rock was thrown through my window as I was sleeping. (It landed on my bed, thankfully, not on my head.) The next week, a matic (a gardening tool) was thrown through the window again, this time narrowly missing my head.

What did my father do? For one week, he camped outside with his rifle. Of course we called the police, but my father decided he'd do what most normal men would do. He was defending his family from any further attacks.

I remember when the Virginia Tech murders happened. A deranged student nonchalantly walked through the classrooms, lined up the students, and then shot them methodically -- all this while not one man rose up to attack him. After the horrific massacre, I cried out to my husband, "Where were the men?! Could not a small group of them rushed this nutjob and tackled him to the floor where they could have disarmed him?" Obviously the answer to my question was a tragic "no." This generation of young men had the fight bred out of them long before they arrived at college. It was ironic that one of the bravest men during that long ordeal was a Holocaust survivor, who physically prevented the killer from entering his classroom until almost all of the students had escaped through the classroom window.

When men are not clear on what they should defend and why; they become disillusioned and directionless. They have no understanding of honor, let alone knowing how to responsibly conduct themselves in a relationship.

One of the things I deeply desired before I married was to find a man who would fight for me. I meant this on several levels. I wanted a man who would put forth an effort to win my affections and also, a man who would defend me if I was in danger. I will never forget my second date with my husband. We attended the huge Labor Day festival in Cincinnati at the riverfront, to watch the spectacular fireworks show in the evening. The crowd at this annual event is massive, and we finally found a small empty piece of land to stretch out a blanket. After awhile, I got up, saying I needed to find a restroom. My future husband also stood up.

I looked at him, slightly surprised. "Oh, do you need to visit the restroom also?"

He smiled. "No. But I'm going to accompany you. It's a big crowd here and I don't want you to be alone and unescorted."

Can you imagine how shocked I was at the time? I had never had a man say such a thing to me and of course, I was immediately smitten. If I had thought highly of this gentleman before, at that moment he was placed on a very high pedestal!

I know I am old-fashioned in many ways, but I really don't think I'm that different from most women. Most women yearn to be cherished by a man in a relationship and treated with respect. I'm hoping such men aren't completely gone. Our young women are still looking for them.

I Fought For You

No amount of thanks will ever be enough to repay their sacrifices. But we should always endeavor to thank them and say, "I will never forget." God bless our military and God bless America. Have some tissues nearby. I've watched it several times and cried at each viewing.

Memorial Day and "The Great Santini," Col. Donald Conroy #Catholic #tcot

My husband and I recently watched the film, The Great Santini, featuring Robert Duvall as the abrasive, abusive Lt. Col. Wilbur "Bull" Meechum. The character came from Pat Conroy's novel, which used his real father's nickname and a large part of his personality. Pat's father, Marine Colonel Donald Conroy, had a darker side that only his family witnessed. He was both physically and verbally abusive to his children and wife. What was astounding was that after Pat wrote the book, his father read it and did a complete turnaround as he sought to distance himself from the story's portrayal of him.

The film is not easy to watch. "Bull" Meechum lives up to his name by barreling through whatever obstacle stands in his way to perfection -- including his family. Meechum's fiery path climaxes in a stunning scene when his son Ben (played by Michael O'Keefe) finally beats him at a one-on-one game of hoops. The problem is, no one in the family had ever beaten Bull in anything. As the family congratulated Ben, Bull gathers up steam and proceeds to throw insults and accusations at the family, alienates them and then demands another game. The wife and other children walk away in hurt and disgust while Ben refuses to play again, emphasizing he won fair and square. As Ben leaves, Bull follows him, taunting him and bouncing the basketball off the back of his head. Later during a stormy night, Bull is shown practicing his game in the pouring rain. Ben's mother tries to comfort her son by saying Bull finally realized his son had become better than him and he'd have to work harder to beat him. Playing in the rain, knowing that Ben must be watching, was Bull's way of apologizing.

Col. Donald Conroy was one of the greatest fighter pilots that ever lived. From reading about him, I'm not quite sure he'd say that. He never told his children about all the awards and decorations he had earned. He was given the Distinguished Flying Cross (with two award stars) for heroism or extraordinary achievement while participating in an aerial flight, subsequent to November 11, 1918. Those additional stars mean he was awarded it two more times.

I thought about the kind of man it takes to win a war. Certainly not every warrior physically abuses his children and wife. But pilots are of a different breed. There is no room for error in their mission. Quick decisions have to be made and they better be the right ones or else. My husband and I had a conversation about the movie afterward. He judged "Bull" Meechum much more harshly than I did. Although I usually see things in black and white, I couldn't seem to do that with this character. Knowing it was based on the life of a man who bravely served this country made it especially difficult.

I'll leave the speculation as to why a man abuses his family to the professionals. All I know is that "Bull" Meechum, and I suspect Col. Donald Conroy; was on a personal mission to perfect their personal world. Because serving in the military is an exercise of discipline, those who have high expectations of themselves gravitate toward it, viewing it as the highest challenge to complete. Having a family of those who may not have such drive could, understandably, be frustrating. Unfortunately, some take out those frustrations on others in an abusive manner.

The good news is that after Pat Conroy's book came out and his father read it, he broke. Seeing a character act like him, sobered up Col. Conroy real fast. Suddenly, he was on the road to make amends with his son and family. For the rest of his days, he grew closer to his son and cheered a nephew as he played basketball, causing wonder in all who knew him. Reading this story showed me that redemption is possible, even in the most hardened cases. (His Winning Season: The Story of Pat Conroy, the 'Real Santini,' and the Citadel's Basketball Team's Remarkable Run)

Today we celebrate Memorial Day. It's a day to remember those who have served our country and those who have sacrificed their lives for it. There are some who protest war, claiming it's an unnecessary evil. I say it is a necessary response to evil. Men like Col. Donald Conroy served our country with pride and dedication. The very traits that make a man a fierce warrior may not always transfer smoothly to a more peaceful existence. Many men are permanently altered by war and it's difficult to see how it could be otherwise. But I am so grateful for the men who took upon their shoulders the burden of fighting for freedom. When I see a story like The Great Santini, I'm reminded of how some men viewed the battleground as a personal challenge, taking it as an affront to their ferocious sense of justice. The definitions of right and wrong are usually orchestrated by politicians.

However, for our military, it comes down to a simple concept. Our great country did not become great by sitting down with our enemies and trying to negotiate peace. It came about because we kicked their ass.

So God bless all our military men and women this day. May those who have sacrificed their lives for our country R.I.P., and may those living who wrestle with their inner demons, find peace before they leave this world to enter the next. Amen.

Col. Donald Conroy's Euology, by his son, Pat Conroy

The children of fighter pilots tell different stories than other kids do. None of our fathers can write a will or sell a life insurance policy or fill out a prescription or administer a flu shot or explain what a poet meant. We tell of fathers who land on aircraft carriers at pitch-black night with the wind howling out of the China Sea.

Our fathers wiped out aircraft batteries in the Philippines and set Japanese soldiers on fire when they made the mistake of trying to overwhelm our troops on the ground.

Your Dads ran the barber shops and worked at the post office and delivered the packages on time and sold the cars, while our Dads were blowing up fuel depots near Seoul, were providing extraordinarily courageous close air support to the beleaguered Marines at the Chosin Reservoir, and who once turned the Naktong River red with blood of a retreating North Korean battalion.

We tell of men who made widows of the wives of our nations' enemies and who made orphans out of all their children.

You don't like war or violence? Or napalm? Or rockets? Or cannons or death rained down from the sky?

Then let's talk about your fathers, not ours. When we talk about the aviators who raised us and the Marines who loved us, we can look you in the eye and say "you would not like to have been America's enemies when our fathers passed overhead".

We were raised by the men who made the United States of America the safest country on earth in the bloodiest century in all recorded history.

Our fathers made sacred those strange, singing names of battlefields across the Pacific: Guadalcanal, Iwo Jima, Okinawa, the Chosin Reservoir, Khe Sanh and a thousand more. We grew up attending the funerals of Marines slain in these battles.

Your fathers made communities like Beaufort decent and prosperous and functional; our fathers made the world safe for democracy.

Full Eulogy

In Praise of Real Men #tcot #sgp #Catholic

I deliberated over whether to title this entry "In Praise of Men" or "In Praise of Real Men." I chose the latter because "real men" are men not only born with the obvious sexual identity of a man, but those who possess the rock-solid pursuit of being honorable, loyal, hard-working, and true to self. Women know the type of men I'm talking about. They're not Alan Alda. They're John Wayne.

In my early twenties, I flirted with feminism, drawn by the idea of equal pay for women. It didn't take long, however, to observe how many feminist books immediately attacked Christianity (as a male-dominated religion) and promoted a sneering condescension toward men in general. Some feminists loathed men so much that they consciously made the decision to become a lesbian. (Which is one of the reasons why I will never believe there is such a thing as a "gay gene.")

You Say Superiority Like That's a Bad Thing...

As I started to pray and ask God to give me His understanding of male and female roles, my eyes opened to "real men" and how difficult it is for them to persevere in our overly-feminized culture. One of the more successful attacks by feminists was to accuse men of being a "male chauvinist pig." (Notice how authoritarian figures such as police officers were also called "pigs?") Here are some interesting facts about the word, chauvinist. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, it came from a French character in a play, Nicolas Chauvin, noted for his excessive patriotism and devotion to Napoleon in Théodore and Hippolyte Cogniard's play La Cocarde tricolore (1831). It also describes an attitude of superiority toward members of the opposite sex.

If this is true, then there are certainly a group of female chauvinists running around since they quite openly profess women being better than men.

Let's examine this concept of superiority. Would not an Olympian athlete be considered superior when he or she earns a gold medal? Would a student not be considered superior to her fellow students if she earned an "A" while most of the class earned a "C?" And would not a man be considered superior in strength in football? Superior is not a political concept. It is a comparative fact when dealing with intellect and physical prowess. However, we now live in crazy-land, where school sports have done away with keeping score so that the losing team doesn't feel so bad.

Do you remember the outrage some women had when they wanted to become firemen? The test, they claimed, was discriminatory. Brenda Berkman filed a lawsuit saying that the physical strength section (which kept women out) was unnecessary. She won and that part of the exam was removed. Excuse me, but I'm half-German and full of muscle. If I'm unconscious in a burning building, I don't want some female firefighter pulling half of me out because that's all she can handle. This is a clear case of a man being superior to a woman. A man's upper body strength will always trump a woman's and is a good reason why men should be firemen. Firefighters must have incredible strength and endurance, able to hold a hose full of water with 150 lbs. per square inch of pressure. A petite 130 lb. woman is not going to cut it.

So I happily concede that men are superior to women physically. Sure, there are some exceptions, but overall, men are simply stronger than women. And although there may not be as many of them, there still exist men who will throw themselves on a bomb to save others. Men like Jasper Schuringa realize that time is of the essence and that part of being a man is taking action. These are the "real men" in my book. Men who are acting upon something deep within themselves, a knowing of who they are and a clear definition of right and wrong.

Let's Hear It For Men Of Action

I suspect Jasper Schuringa and others like him had a sense of strength instilled in him at a young age. Decisions such as throwing oneself on a Islamofascist terrorist doesn't come from having the masculinity beaten out of you by a feminized school curriculum. It comes from having true masculinity modeled for you and realizing that our world needs men of action.

I will never forget how stunned I was when the Virginia Tech killer, Seung-Hui Cho, easily mowed down a number of students in their classrooms. At one point, he lined up a group of students and then shot them execution-style. My first thought was, where were the men? Were there no men who would rush this killer, tackling him to prevent further carnage? And then I thought about what our schools have done to young boys, penalizing them for being boys and beating any desire to take action against evil out of them. Because as far as our wimpy schools go, there is "no such thing as evil." Those who commit such horrific crimes are instead "victims" and must be given understanding, not judgement.

Well, real men know how to deal out judgement, in my book.

Real men don't sit around, waiting for some nutjob to aerate their bodies with a .22-caliber Walther P22 semi-automatic and a 9 mm semi-automatic Glock 19 handgun. Real men don't wait until a group of Islamofascist terrorists crash their jet into the U.S. Capitol building. Real men take the bull by the horns and say he who hesitates, is lost. Real men usually wear uniforms and don't care who they tick off. Real men will protect a woman, even if she's Hillary Clinton. Real men rock my world.

Are there any real men left? Yes and I believe more are on the way. It is my hope that fellow Catholic blogger (The Lair of the Catholic Cavemen), "Vir Speluncae Catholicus," is wrong on why we'll lose the war. Real men have saved the world before. I'm hoping they'll save it again.

(Video below: Harsh Language Involved!)

To Men Who Are Anti-Military #tcot #sgp #marine #army #airforce #navy

(Note: This post is pretty snarky, more firewater than soothing honey...)

This is a response to "Mark," who brazenly entered the lion's den over at "The Lair of the Catholic Cavemen" and defecated in the combox. Vir Speluncae Catholicus posted an entry over the low attendance for the TLM at Camp Lejeune. I certainly understand how the TLM is strong meat and some are immediately put off by what it demands of us. I left a comment saying as much.

But within the twentyplus comments came this gem from an anonymous poster, "Mark," who explained why the numbers were dwindling:

Maybe it's because they are required to check their brains at the door as they enter the Marines, or for that matter, any branch of the U.S. military.

Well, dem's fightin' words for a woman who has a stepson in the Army, and a host of family members who fought in WWII, The Korean War, and Operation Freedom. (And yes, an uncle who was a Marine.) I can't tell you how my blood boiled as I thought about punks like "Mark" who felt anonymously free to trash the military as though they had absolutely nothing to do with his life. Forget the fact that our country hasn't suffered a major terrorist attack in eight years (finally succumbing to a dirtbag terrorist at Ft. Hood because of PC-poison). Our military are fighting the enemy over there so they don't come over here - but hey, "Mark" knows better.

Mark is a classic example of a man who has been emasculated. Shrouded in a cloak of anonymity, the "Marks" of the Internet can freely roam and take potshots at the real men of the world. In my comment on the LCC blog, I remarked that it was because of men like Mark that the Virginia Tech shooter was able to prolong his rampage. When one guy (yes, one guy who is armed), lines up a bunch of people - and there are men in that line-up - and not ONE of those men says, "What the hell are we doing? Let's rush this *ssh*le and bring him down!" well then, Houston, we have a problem.

The sad fact is that for quite some time, men who serve our country, (and our states and cities within the fire department and law enforcement) are what I call "real men." Someone like Mark would love to simply dismiss them as knuckle-dragging Neanderthals, but to me that just sounds like sour grapes. Something happened to these "Marks" in our country and I place most of the blame on our public school system. For many years, our young boys were punished for being boys. They were corrected for acting upon their God-given maleness, and sadly - brainwashed into thinking that there is never a moral case for war. I also blame feminism, which has ruined our men, women, children, and our country.

We live in a dangerous world. We're seeing this reality each day in the headlines. We're also seeing more death as politically-correct thinking tightens its noose upon our society. I would bet money (if I was a gambler) that Mark is a big believer in multi-culturalism, diversity training, social justice, egalitarianism, and either an atheist or agnostic. When your mind is full of lies, it's tough to recognize truth when it smacks you upside the head.

And the truth is this, Mark: there is a place in our world for nobility, bravery, honor, integrity, sacrifice, perseverance, and most definitely - victory. I don't know what happened to take the fight out of you but someday, you may be looking up at the wrong end of a sword.

And at that moment, you just may wish that someone who took an oath to serve and protect this country, was by your side.



My full comment to Mark is below:

Now, if I may, I'd like a word with Mark, if the coward is still reading.

Mark, it seems you feel quite comfortable criticizing our military. This reveals something. Basically, a huge sense of inadequacy. I'm not sure if your mother stopped breast-feeding you before you were ready, but let me be clear: the military has kept this country safe. Perhaps you tried to enter the military but didn't have what it took to be a Marine. Who knows.

Your responses made me think of this: The wussified men at Virginia Tech who wouldn't know what a "bum rush" was if it sat on their face. You are the product of an overly feminized culture with no backbone because its been throttled out of you. There's no need to slam men who still have one.

Since you are obviously a beta man, I invite you to visit my blog some time and bring it. Because as much as I'm aiming toward heaven, I don't suffer fools gladly and when needed, wield the wisdom stick. And instead of hiding behind a blank Blogger name, it would be nice to see if you had a blog, too, so we could visit and leave all sorts of nice little comments.